Bevans' Political Soapbox, Vol. 1

From: , , By Bevans on Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Sorry folks, I've decided not to run for President in 2008. My 2000 campaign was a bigger success than I ever imagined (I got one vote), and I honestly don't remember if I ran in 2004. But in 2008 you will not see my name on your ballots.

Why? Because, quite simply, I don't want to be the one to have to clean up Bush's mess. I don't want to have to fix the colossol clusterfucks in Afghanistan, Iraq, and Iran (just wait). I don't want to be the one to try to patch up our international relationships. De-Bushifying our education, healthcare, welfare, social security, and numerous other public services would be a major undertaking, and I just don't want to spend all my time doing that. I don't want to have to break up all the illegal monopolies that have formed and flourished thanks to Bush's "let big business do whatever the fuck it wants" policy.

In fact, undoing all that Bush has done to this country and this world is going to take decades, so I may not even run in 2012 or 2016. We'll see.

Another reason for not running is that I'll probably be labelled an "enemy combatant" or something and hauled off to a secret prison somewhere, just for writing this post. Naturally, that would put a major strain on my campaign. So it's best to just leave it to someone else for now.

In the coming weeks, I'll be offering my opinions on the other losers running for President in 2008. And what a sorry bunch of...

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